


Orvin and Lewis (parody of Peachy_ito's parody)

by princess_tones



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Baby, Buttermilk - Freeform, Car vehicle, Container, Double parody, Frustration, GUD, Gift, M/M, Marriage, Next level shit, Obvious mockery, Other, Parody, Race, Sex, Shit, Violence, ass, body - Freeform, car, fresh, idek, joke, rubbish - Freeform, what, who knows - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-26
Updated: 2017-09-26
Packaged: 2019-01-05 19:19:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12196038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/princess_tones/pseuds/princess_tones
Summary: Orvin just wants 3 things in life:the world to be gud, to win a random race and beat Lewis, and to get some of dat ass.He will do anything to geddit.





	Orvin and Lewis (parody of Peachy_ito's parody)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Peachy_ito](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Peachy_ito/gifts).



> I don't know what to say. Just enjoy if you understand this sort of humour. Not to be taken seriously!

Orvin was washing his car; because it was dirty. He grabbed his spongey wiper and whipped the glass windows of the automobile. His car drove away with a tear in its eye, for Orvin had been scrubbing way too hard.  
"Uh noo, Lewis! My vehicle is gone!" Orvin wailed, touching Lewis' shoulder with his yellow whipper. Lewis bounced away from his nasty touch, his eyeball chasing his other eyeball about his cranium, but it wasn't fast enough to reach his eyeball on time; it made him eye-rate (aka: irate) that he wasn't capable of catching his own goddam eyebol.

After some faffing about, Lewis grabbed Orvin and beat him with a stick to make the blonde ogre calm down. His saxaphone-mouthpiece-coloured eyes widened in stinking shock, when Orvin let out a poop or two onto the already dirty carpet.

"Anghsh! Now look what you've done you big pooper scooper! Now I've gadda clean ap the pleis all owersh againsh!" He anged in anger in annoyance. His flippers carried him away to look at some brooms in the shop so he could clean the whole universe because it was dirty like Orvins fresh ass backside bottom.

Orvins backside bottom released a steaming darlek stench, causing him to fly away and never come back.

He came back 3 seconds later because the darlek stopped working like Drake, he gotta go to work. He flexed his hamstrings but they broke and he fell off. Lewish found his old odd body machine lying in a ditch and buried it in eggy surprise mixture mix mix. Orvins stankin corpse waved at Lewis but he wasnt actually just waving. Soon he pulled Levi's body corpse down into the soil and smooshed him with his mouth on his long, little legs until he reached his buboo brigette. The fire brigade found the two numpties in the ground and extinguished their asses.

They burned up and flew back to Orvins car vehicle where he brushed those gnarly gnashers of his. They were sparkling clean like rats furry friends playpen.

"All I wanted was for you to brush your goddam teeth! Angshsh!!" Lewis yelled by his body container.

Orvin grinned and sucked his own foot into his gnasher flasher and came back out of his whipper. He had weewee on him now weewee.

"I jus did? D'ya wornt to go to da cella? I've got beers from all sorts of cuntries in dere."

Lewis yelped! " yes," he zoomed on his skin into the cellar. Krvin was standing there naked as if by wizardry and warlock with his papeenay in his hand. He whipped Levi with his yellow whipper and accidentally started having sex with his body corpse but it didn't work. They gave birth to a beautiful baby in record time on the spot and the baby kicked them both in their longbottom booty bottoms.

"AAAGDGSGSH! SHAVE US!" both of the onion people cried in vain.

"Shave? Okay!" The bby greed grredishly.

"No! Shave! We've got a lisp! S A V E!"

"brb forgot shave" the baby waxed their botties with juicy cleaning produck. Now they were shaved and the whole world was good, which made Orvin a very happy engine useful engin enjin.

Once that was over, Orvin rolled that body corpse out of the grave, tugging Lewis by his gravy undercut into his lamb mutton chops foot bay bays. They started running to see who would last longer: Ooorrv oorr Lewiss. Luckily Lewis had brought his body bag along in order to beat Orvin in a race, so it was easy to duck out of the way of his rude ballhead swings attack.

"HEY" Orvin smiled in victory even though he was losing the race. His body of death ran and trampled over Lewis', but Lewis already put his brunette bodymobeela about the place, which served as an anchor to in which he could hoist his limbs and all of his toes and teeths over the finish line.

Orvins body walked through the finish line second later "auwhhh" it said in disappointment as it lost the race. He splashed some vanilla and vinegar grapefoot onto his head in shame, but nothing could hide that big ugly mug.

Someone grabbed his handle because he was a mug, so it worked. They pulled him to the side.

"Hey, Orv?" The person said with a treacherous lippy lip.

"Nnghyehhs?" Orvin replied out of his mootch (moustache)

"You ackshully wun da race. Didn't you realise that Lewises body body went OVER the finish line? Well??"

"ohhhhhh, ahhhh, ummmm.... weeeel.... yeh. Dus this mean I wun d'race?"

"Duh bottom. Yu've wun. Go and collect that big snugglee reward prize achievement surprise birthday award gift present attainment price prizing. Well?" The person said calmly, sounding like water and chicken cutlet bowl put together underneath a big piece of gravy granual piece.

Orvin ran on his hind legs (because he didn't have any other legs) and his belly led him to Lewis because he wanted to eat him for trying to steal his big snugglee reward prize achievement surprise birthday award gift present attainment price prizing.

Lewises eyes widened in shpock wen he saw Orvelly running towards him, he dived under a piece of ghoul flesh in order to hide his body container. Butt it was too late for hid buttock buttum to hide quickally enuf. 

"Gotcha!" Orvin shouted like a big old beast and jumped onto Lewis; Lewis' and hands and feet and chicken and rice scattered onto the ground like chickpeas and popcorn balanced meal diet. Requirement diet.

"Wut do you evun waaant?" Lewis said with a dirty lip drawing on his cheeky cheek.

"You tryed t'tek my... my. My big snugglee reward prize achievement surprise birthday award gift present attainment price prizing!!!! Do y know how mean dat iz?" He wanged his hands around in circles above his blonde forehead hairs, narrowly avoiding shaving them off like yellow snowflake from weewee.

"Soree! Luk, I did win afta ol." Lewis gulped suspiciously and beebed his great penpen out. He looked like madame bertha but he didn't care.

"Get'tway frum me! So wut d'ya wunt to tork about." Orvin cried with his lips scooching to and fro.

"Bumbumfun?" Lewis suggested.

"Yeh, let's do it with our botties!" Orvin cried.

"Get on da flor and spread dose legs like fresh cow udder budder."

Orvin obeyed the command and spread his thigh like cow udder buttermilk.

"I sed like cow udder BUDDDER. Nut BUDDERMILKH!" Lewis screamed like banshee bang bang.

"Oooooeeew, okeeeysg." Orvin waited for a few years so his legs could get hard like butter. He turned around on his axis, and noticed Lewis was already gone. And married to boot, to their grown up baby child produce.

"NOOOOO" Orvin YELLED AND THAT WAS THAT.

 

After the wedding, Orvin got sad and went to the seaside to wash. Lo and behold, Lewis was holding hands with their grown up baby child adult newborn and was rocking the thing back and forth in his small arms. The baby looked happy and grinned up at Lewis's mouth of lips and teeth. They mashed their lips and stuff together, at the same time Orvin buried his face in his finger to hide. It didn't really fit, but he was beyond caring.

"Why did he chus to marry dat insted uv me? I'm mutch betta... bed on it, bed on it, bed on it, bed on it... I need to pick ap my hed and hed howme before it starts raynin." Orvin said like Irvin and walked off leaving huge mammoth and great white shark foot print.

When he got home, a piece of stinkin foot cheese was waiting in the fridge and it actually smeeled gud. He knelt down and reached up to try and get the ches but he couldn't reach.

"Ehhhh I can't reetc da cheez!" He yelled in grief and mix mix moody.

"Maube I can help wiv dat?" A low, deep and high pictured voicy voice squealed like fresh rat in the apartment. Orvin whipped around, minding his whipper and saw Lewis.

"YOU... back again ass?" Orvin screached.

"Whs rung with dat?" Lewis said with sassitude. He strode over to Orvin and tapped his nose beak. A slodge of schnotz came out that looked like scooby doo ladder. Lewis grabbed one sticky end and tied it to the cheese.

"What?!?" Orvin gasped. And the cheese came tumbling down into his face. "Woah... ass-sum (awesome)" he complained in satisfaction happy.

He was so glad to finally get his macheesakee.

**Author's Note:**

> Wasn't that bad, now, was it? Leave a comment or kudo and I'll probs write another one because I'm bored. Wanna chat? Hit me up via email.


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